If you haven’t read about my “Comment Anxiety”, go here first.
Ok right – so by now you know I’m working to overcome my Comment Anxiety – so I’ve created a plan that I thought some of you might find helpful. Let me know what you think or if there are any other steps worth adding. (I’m ok if this becomes a 10+ step plan)
- Comment on every blog post I read – (even if I think my comment is lame)
- Reply to all comments received on my blog
- For everyone who comments on my blog and leaves a link to theirs – go comment on their blog
- Visit every #MumsNight participant blog – read a post a leave a comment
- Discover and comment on 3 new blogs a week
So according to research from UCL it takes about 2 months of daily repetition to build a new habit. So here goes my 2 month plan for overcoming Comment Anxiety and becoming more generous with comments and bloggy contributions.
I read so many blogs with posts that make me laugh, cry, or think somewhat deep thoughts. When I read these posts I want to reach out – respond, publicly share how the post touched me or the communal experience – but I freeze. Hand frozen over the mouse – thoughts and possible comment worthy responses running through my head.. and keep thinking, and thinking until I kind of overthink it. What could I possibly write as a comment that isn’t lame? That doesn’t take away from the writing of the post – or point the direction to a memory or experience of my own that the post triggered in my head.
Does anyone else feel this way?
Here’s a case in point. Today I was reading one of my favorite blogs, The Tiger Father. Specifically I was reading the post Grumpy Old Man Doesn’t Seek the Same – a well written post about how uncomfortable it can be to be matched up with others just because you’re in the same place in life – regardless of personalities, interests etc.
I opened up the comments section to leave a comment as I enjoyed the article so much and it got me thinking about so many things and then I over-thought it again and couldn’t leave any comments.
The same thing happens to me when people write deeply personal posts – where you can see the writing in itself is cathartic for them. Something that heartfelt is so touching – how could I not respond, reach back out over the bloggy void and say I’m here, I hear you, or I’ve been there, or I can’t imagine how hard that must be but I’m truly thankful for you sharing it.
So what am I afraid of – it’s not like someone is going to come along and redline my comments or rate it 1 out of 5 stars publicly. Is it the opening up of my life/thoughts to scrutiny – it’s a little late for that given I’m writing this on my very own blog.
If I think about from the Blogger’s point of view – who’s post I’m reading. Almost all Bloggers love comments – (expect for spammy ones about perscription drugs online,cheap rolexes, and redirects to malware) no matter how lame. It’s wonderful when people let you know they’ve been there – they’ve heard you and they “get it.” Even if “getting it” is in their own way.
Perhaps I should set a challenge for myself – no blog post read goes uncommented upon, no matter how lame I think my response would be. Is this a realistic goal – maybe. I guess we’ll see. In a way it occurs to me that it’s kind of like virtual consciousness raising. You know those exercises in the Real World – where you are supposed to pay attention and be conscious in each moment – taking nothing for granted – thankful for the experience. Maybe we as Mummy and Daddy bloggers and SocialMedia-philes should all set this as a goal.
What do you think? Do you or someone you know suffer from Comment Anxiety? How did you overcome it? What do you think of the challenge I’ve laid out?
You know what – I’m heading back to that blog right now to leave a comment. Step 1, my first babystep.
*update* O.K. I’ve taken my first step and here’s the proof…