a transatlantic mommy / mummy blog – my kids say "tomato" & "to-mah-to"

My failures as the Toothfairy…

My failures as the Toothfairy are numerous. In fact I should probably be banned from the job in the future. Seeing as how I’ve pretty much struck out repeatedly with my eldest son – and I have 2 more kids to follow in his footsteps, I should just hang up my wings now and call it a day.

When he lost his first tooth (bottom center-ish) I was out of town on business. He skyped me to show me the missing tooth, and tell me the story about how it came out while he was eating an apple at the playground. I explained to him via video chat about the Toothfairy and I think the concept of some magical adult sneaking into his room at night to swap his tooth with money was a bit frightening so he said he’d prefer to wait until I got home before setting out the tooth for collection.

He kept the tooth in a glass on the top shelf of our cabinet – and once I got home quickly added a second tooth to it. (bottom center next to the first). He was still hesitant to welcome the Toothfairy so we let it sit longer in the glass. A couple months later (and much showing of the teeth to visitors and playmates) he had apparently heard how his friends were making out like bandits from the Toothfairy visiting their homes and was finally excited about the idea. He asked if we could please put the teeth out for the Toothfairy to come.

I said sure – and that evening went in search of the teeth. Which, given that we’d put them someplace safe shouldn’t have been such a difficult chore, but it was. We had put the teeth in a decorative glass that was a collectible Nutella jar/glass. It had sat with the teeth on the top shelf of our glass cupboard, over all of our heads and out of reach by all but my husband. When I took the step-ladder out to go collect it, it wasn’t there. It was missing!

So began the search for the tooth glass – which I ultimately found…. toothless.

You see, it was still serving a tooth related job, it was in the boys’ bathroom holding toothbrushes, but how it got there is a bit longer story. I had in fact put it there to replace the plastic sesame street sippy cup that was holding the toothbrushes, and had brought it from my bedroom. How did it get to my bedroom? Well, a few days earlier hubs and I had gone out with friends and had a few drinks and before hubs came to bed I asked him to bring me a glass of water, as we both were well on our way to pickled. He did bring the water which I promptly chugged. So this means – I either swallowed my son’s two tiny teeth – or what I’m pinning my hopes to – when my husband reached down the glass and filled or overfilled it with water it swept out the teeth from the glass.  In any case, all I can do is say YUCKY! I suppose you could say I recycled it since it all started out in me in the first place – but still yuck.

The next tooth my son lost, it was the day he had surgery (see that post here) and was afterwards resting on the couch with an ice-lolly (popsicle) and all was well until I heard, “Oh NO!” “I swallowed it!” I came running having no idea what he’d swallowed but it didn’t sound good, only to learn it was his tooth. He was pretty upset and wanted to know if he could still get the tooth back to swap it with the Toothfairy. I told him we had 2 options – 1. He could wait until he pooped it out but this would be a messy and complicated chore or 2. He could write a note to the Toothfairy and since they are magical anyways she’d have no trouble getting the tooth out of his tummy (and to answer his question, no surgery would be involved). No surprise he picked option #2.

“my tooth is in my tummy”

He was delighted to find in the morning the note was gone and replaced by an American Dollar bill. His younger brother meanwhile burst into tears and was nearly inconsolable since he didn’t get a dollar too.

The 4th tooth my son lost the day before this school year started while out at the playground having a snack with the babysitter. He chomped on it thinking it was part of the pretzels he was eating and was able to fish it out of his mouth before swallowing it. He proudly displayed it when I got home and asked if he could leave it for the Toothfairy that night. Finally! A tooth I could magic away for him! So he placed this tooth in a little bag under his pillow before he went to bed. Before going to bed, I found a tiny little tin that I could place the tooth into, and replaced the tooth with another American dollar.  (BTW, the Toothfairy is now low on US currency in the UK and will need to stock up on her next trip to the US).  Unfortunately, the Toothfairy was very tired and forgot to take the colorful tin including the tooth away – and left it on the dining room table. So of course while laying in bed the next morning I hear first, “Oh the Toothfairy came and I got a dollar.” quickly followed by – “Hey what’s this tin and who’s tooth is this?”

The boys came running into my room with the tin enquiring who’s tooth? What’s this tin, where did the tooth come from? My hubs tried telling the boys not to worry about it as he quickly put the tin away but they wouldn’t let up. Finally I said “it’s my tooth!” Which was quickly followed by two boys scampering over me to peer into my mouth. Luckily a few years ago I had a molar removed which left a space at the very back and I pointed to this large space and said that’s where it came from, and amazingly they were good with that – and calm resumed and they promptly moved on to the topic of breakfast and who’d get the iPad first….


So here we are – 4 teeth down in the bottom center for my eldest son, and the first 2 to be lost have grown back. He’s got a full mouthfull of teeth to go and then comes my younger son and later on, the new baby.


Is it time to hang up my wings and or pass them on to my hubs? Or do you think I’ll be 5th tooth lucky?


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8 years ago 2 Comments Short URL

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